Unbelievable Luxury Awaits: Your Dream Stay at Hotel Les Chevaliers, France
Unbelievable Luxury Awaits? Let's Talk About Hotel Les Chevaliers, France (and My Love Affair with a Poolside Bar)
Okay, folks, buckle up. Because I'm about to tell you everything – and I mean everything – about Hotel Les Chevaliers in France. "Unbelievable Luxury Awaits," they say. And you know what? They weren't entirely lying. But let's be real, luxury is a journey, not just a destination, and this review is going to be just as gloriously messy as my last attempt at packing a carry-on.
First, the basics, because, you know, adulting:
Accessibility & Safety: Because Let's Face It, Life Needs to Be Easy (and Safe!)
Listen, I'm not wheelchair-bound myself, but I did see a couple of guests who were and navigating the hotel seemed pretty straightforward. Wheelchair accessible areas were clearly marked and the elevators are a godsend for anyone with luggage (or, you know, just feeling lazy like me). They claim to have facilities for disabled guests, which is a good sign, but frankly, I didn't delve into all the specifics. If you have specific needs, I'd recommend calling the hotel directly for the nitty-gritty.
Now, the security side. They take it seriously. CCTV in common areas and outside the property, 24-hour security, fire extinguishers, smoke alarms… you get the picture. And post-pandemic, they've really upped their game. Hand sanitizer everywhere, staff trained in safety protocol, rooms sanitized between stays. They're even using anti-viral cleaning products, and offering room sanitization opt-out, though who wouldn't want a freshly sanitized room? It's practically a spa treatment before the spa treatment. They also have a Doctor/nurse on call, thank goodness.
But here's where it gets a little… messy (because that's life, right?). They say they have cashless payment service. Good. But finding the right person to take my Amex was like searching for a unicorn. Ended up having a very awkward conversation with a very bored looking waiter, and well I just ended up taking out cash at the cash withdrawal machine. (Note to self: find out about the cash withdrawal fee BEFORE you do it.)
Internet: Ah, the Eternal Struggle (and Glorious Wi-Fi in All Rooms!)
This isn't a remote cabin, thank god. They boast free Wi-Fi in all rooms! They Internet access – LAN, Internet access – wireless, Internet… They practically throw internet at you! Which is great, because, honestly, social media doesn't take a vacation and my deadlines don't care about sunbathing. The Wi-Fi actually worked (major win!), though the initial login process felt like something out of a spy movie. Oh, they also have Wi-Fi for special events, apparently.
Things to Do & Ways to Relax: My Poolside Bar Obsession
Okay, this is where things get interesting. They have a pool with a view. And it is gorgeous. The swimming pool [outdoor] and the swimming pool itself are both divine. They also boast a Sauna, Spa, Spa/sauna, Steamroom, Fitness center, Gym/fitness, and even a Foot Bath… I mean, good for them. I tried the gym once. I lasted about five minutes. My true love in this hotel? The Poolside bar.
And here's my story, the one that really sold me on this place. The first day, I arrived late, exhausted from the flight from hell and I just wanted a damn drink. Walked to the Poolside bar, ordered…a bottle of water. Okay, fine. The next day I was ready! I ordered a cocktail, a real one. The bartender, a charming guy named Jean-Luc with eyes that could melt glaciers, smiled. He remembered me. That's the level of detail right there. He took a moment and, with a twinkle in his eye, crafted me the perfect margarita. I spent the next few days parked by the pool, reading, swimming, and developing a borderline unhealthy relationship with Jean-Luc and his cocktail-making skills. The Happy hour was the best! This is what I call a vacation!
Things to Do (Other Than Ignoring My Responsibilities) & Ways to Relax (if you have time between cocktails)
They've got the usual suspects: Body scrub, Body wrap, Gym/fitness, Massage. I'm not a spa person, personally, but I did hear wonderful things about the massages at the Spa from some other guests, who looked so blissed out when they came out.
Dining, Drinking, and Snacking: A Gastronomic Adventure (Mostly Delicious)
Right, the food. They've got options. So many options. Restaurants, a Coffee shop, a Snack bar… You won't go hungry!
Restaurants: They have several. Asian cuisine in restaurant, International cuisine in restaurant, Western cuisine in restaurant. Buffet in restaurant. A la carte in restaurant. Vegetarian restaurant, though I'm guessing, like most hotels, the Vegetarian option might be a bit meh (that's just my hunch, I did not try it). The Breakfast [buffet] was epic - I mean the breakfast service was truly a highlight! I had some Asian breakfast most mornings, mixed with a classic Western breakfast. The Coffee/tea in restaurant was decent. I had a few desserts in restaurant, which were just okay. Honestly, my heart was always with the Poolside bar.
Other stuff: Room service [24-hour] (essential, let's be honest), Bottle of water, Salad in restaurant, Soup in restaurant, even a Coffee/tea in restaurant. The variety is great!
Alternative meal arrangement. I never used this, but its good to know they have options if needed.
Services and Conveniences: The Perks, the Pitfalls, and the Unexpected Delights
They offer the usual array of stuff. Daily housekeeping (thank you, because I can't even), Laundry service, Dry cleaning, Concierge, Luggage storage… All pretty standard.
The Elevator: This is just a random note. It smells like vanilla, and that alone is an experience.
The Weird Good Stuff: I really appreciated the Invoice provided. Being able to separate travel expenses for work is a godsend! They also offer Food delivery.
Business stuff. They also have Business facilities, Meeting/banquet facilities, and Meetings.
For the Kids: Is This Place Kid-Friendly?
I’m not a kid, I'm not in touch with my inner child, and my kids are all grown up so I didn't really pay attention! They claim to be Family/child friendly, and have Babysitting service.
Rooms: My Sanctuary (and the Reason I Needed That Poolside Bar)
The rooms? Generally well-appointed. I had a Non-smoking room (thank goodness). Air conditioning (essential in summer). Wi-Fi [free] (duh). Coffee/tea maker (important!). Mini bar (necessary).
The extras: Bathrobes (yes, please!), Slippers (I lived in these), Free bottled water (stay hydrated!). Private bathroom. I had a Seating area where I could hide away from the world.
The quirks: My room had a Window that opens (thank you!), though the view was of…the hotel next door. But hey, at least I got some fresh air.
The "Meh": The Alarm clock made a noise like a dying animal, but I managed to get through it.
Getting Around: The Airport Transfer, the Taxi, and the Mystery of the Car Park
They offer an Airport transfer, which is convenient. They have Car park [on-site], AND they have a Car park [free of charge]. So that's great. Even better, they have Valet parking. I, however took the Taxi service!
The Verdict (and a Killer Offer!)
Look, Hotel Les Chevaliers isn't perfect. Nothing ever is. But it's got a lot going for it. It's beautiful, the staff is generally friendly (and Jean-Luc is a legend), the food is decent, and the location is fantastic. It's a place where you can go and disappear, or a place you can go to work and make it a perfect base for a short trip.
Here's my offer, just for you:
Book your stay at Hotel Les Chevaliers now and get:
- A complimentary welcome cocktail at the Poolside Bar (ask for Jean-Luc!).
- **A
Hotel Les Chevaliers: A Messy, Beautiful Mess
Okay, so here's the thing. I thought, I really thought, I was going to be all sophisticated, all "Oh, yes, Hotel Les Chevaliers, darling, utterly charming." Turns out, "charming" is a loose term that covers a multitude of sins, and I, my friends, was about to be intimately acquainted with ALL of them. Here's how it actually went down:
Day 1: The Arrival…and the Cheese Debacle
- 14:00 - Arrival & Check-In: First impressions? The hotel is…well, it's there. It exists. The lobby is smaller than my hallway back home, and the receptionist, a woman who looked like she'd seen a ghost and decided to become one herself (in other words, very pale and a touch…fragile), barely cracked a smile. "Room…307," she croaked. "Beware the creaky floorboards." Oh god, I thought, foreshadowing at its finest.
- 14:30 - Room Reconnaissance: The room itself? A tiny, aggressively flowery space. The wallpaper was giving me flashbacks to my grandma's guest bedroom. The creaky floorboards? She wasn't kidding. They sang a mournful song with every step. But the view, the view was halfway decent, overlooking the town square. Okay, I thought, maybe this won't be a full-on disaster. Famous last words, right?
- 15:00 - The Cheese Shopping Fiasco (Part I): Determined to embrace the joie de vivre, I decided to head straight for the local fromagerie. "Find the best cheeses," I thought, "become a cheese connoisseur!" Turns out, I'm more of a cheese-enthusiast-who-panics-in-foreign-language shops. I babbled something in broken French about "le cheese…um… strong, please?" The cheese guy (who looked suspiciously like he'd also seen a ghost, but this time it had stolen his cheese mustache) just stared at me. Finally, I pointed randomly at a hunk of something pungent-looking. He wrapped it up. I left, clutching my prize, feeling utterly defeated.
- 15:30 - Cheese Tasting (and Regret): Back in the room, I unwrapped my glorious cheese… and gagged, a little. It smelled like old gym socks and despair. I took a bite. It tasted like… well, it tasted like old gym socks and despair. I swear, my taste buds just went on strike. This was the first hint as to how the whole trip would go.
- 17:00 - Dinner at the Hotel Restaurant: I was tired, defeated, and still reeling from the cheese. So, I figured the hotel restaurant would be safe. Wrong. The "steak frites" was more like "steak… shrunk frites." The steak was tougher than my grandma's shoe. And the frites? Soggy sadness. At least the wine was good, albeit a bit too much in volume.
- 20:00 - Bedtime: The creaky floorboards and the disappointment of the cheese and the steak and the overall existential dread were slowly working their way to my brain. I gave up and went to bed, my stomach grumbling. All in all, not a great first day.
Day 2: Churches, Cats, and a near-meltdown in a café
- 09:00 - Breakfast Mishap: Breakfast was, to put it kindly, sparse. Dry croissants, weak coffee, and a mysterious jam that tasted suspiciously like… glue. I ate it anyway. Starvation will do that to you.
- 10:00 - Church Hopping: Determined to be cultured, I embarked on a church tour. Churches are beautiful, I thought. Surely this would go well. I'd have loved to appreciate the stained glass windows and the history, but my brain was still stuck on the cheese, the steak, the glue-jam. I'm that kind of person who's all about the detail.
- 11:00 - Cat Encounter: The streets of the town are alive with cats, and I mean alive. Fat, lazy cats that seemed to be permanently judging me. I became obsessed with them. I even befriended one that had a missing ear (yes, I know, I know). For a while, it was just me and the cat.
- 12:00 - Café Chaos: I needed coffee, strong coffee. I went in a café. I sat at a table and waited. And waited. And waited. Finally, I managed to flag down a waiter who clearly hated his life. He slammed a coffee down in front of me. I took a sip. It was… lukewarm. I couldn't handle it anymore! I let loose in a stream-of-consciousness rant at the poor waiter, which combined broken French and English. "Le coffee… pas bon! Very bad! I need to be happy! HELP ME!" The other patrons stared. It was a scene. To this day, I still get embarrassed thinking about that. I took a deep breath and apologized. He grunted and brought me something else.
- 14:00 - The Cheese Shopping Fiasco (Part II): I couldn't let The Cheese win. I went back to the fromagerie, determined to redeem myself. This time, I tried asking for a softer cheese. "Something…creamy?" I asked. The cheese guy just sighed. I think he remembered me. I ended up with a brie, at least I knew this cheese. A WIN!
- 18:00 - Dinner Attempt #2: Decided to skip the hotel and find a small bistro. Success! I had a delicious, ridiculously sized steak. Everything was fixed.
- 20:00 - Bedtime: The creaky floorboards now seemed to be part of the experience.
Day 3: Departure and Reflections (and a lingering cheese smell)
- 09:00 - Goodbye Breakfast: The glue jam was gone! It had been replaced by a slightly better jam. Progress!
- 10:00 - Hotel Check-Out: I left Hotel Les Chevaliers. Did I enjoy it? It's complicated. The imperfections of the place were real. It wasn't the perfectly quaint experience I'd envisioned. I found myself looking out the window waiting for the cat to come back.
- 10:30 - Final Thoughts: I realized that it was the imperfection, the mess, the little disasters, and the cat, that made this trip memorable. It's the things that go wrong that create the stories, right?
- 11:00 - Driving back home… I think I can still smell the cheese…
So there you have it. My Hotel Les Chevaliers experience. Definitely not a Michelin-star rated trip, but one I won't forget anytime soon. Would I go back? Maybe. If the creaky floorboards were fixed and the glue jam was gone. And if I make friends with more cats. And if I finally understand how to get good cheese.
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Unbelievable Luxury Awaits: FAQs About Hotel Les Chevaliers (Because You'll *Need* Them)
Alright, so you're eyeing the Hotel Les Chevaliers, huh? Smart move! But let's be real, this place... it's intense. So, before you go dreaming of endless champagne and caviar (which, trust me, you *will*), let's get some questions answered. This is based on *my* experience - and let me tell you, it was a rollercoaster.
1. Is it *really* as luxurious as it looks in the pictures? Like, actually?
Okay, the pictures? They’re… flattering. Let's just say they have *exceptional* lighting. But yes. Mostly. The lobby? Jaw-dropping. The chandeliers could probably finance a small country. The rooms? My suite was bigger than my freaking *apartment* back home! But here's the thing... I found a tiny, nearly-invisible speck of dust on the *silver* fruit bowl in my room once. SILVER! I almost had a meltdown. So, yeah… luxurious, but perfection? Maybe not. (And the elevators are a little… slow. Like, "contemplating your life choices" slow.)
2. What's the deal with the staff? Are they ACTUALLY nice, or just trained to *appear* nice?
Okay, this is where things get interesting. Most of the staff are genuinely lovely. The concierge? Magic. They found me a last-minute table at that impossible-to-get-into bistro, and I swear, they did it with a *wink*. The housekeeping staff? They refilled my mini-bar with my *exact* preferred brand of sparkling water before I even realized I was running low. Creepy-amazing. But… and there’s always a but… You get this feeling sometimes… This slight, almost imperceptible… tension. Like a tightly wound spring. I think they're so intensely focused on perfection, that if anything goes *slightly* off, they’re going to die inside. (I may have accidentally spilled red wine on a white tablecloth. Let's just say the reaction was… dramatic.)
3. Is the food as incredible as everyone says? (Because I need to know…)
Okay, the food. Prepare yourself. It's… a *lot*. The Michelin-starred restaurant? Worth every single Euro (and believe me, it's a LOT of Euros). I had this duck confit that literally brought tears to my eyes. TEARS! The breakfast buffet is a crime against humanity… because it's SO GOOD, you’ll eat way too much and feel horrific afterward. But. And there's *always* a but, isn't there? On one occasion, I ordered room service, and the *soup* was cold. COLD! I was mortified and sent it back, and the replacement… was still lukewarm. I almost lost it. But, overall, the food is mostly life-changing. Just… maybe check the soup temperature before you dig in.
4. What should I pack? (Besides my diamond-encrusted toothbrush, obviously.)
Okay, people. Listen. Ditch the diamond toothbrush (kidding… mostly). Pack things you feel *confident* in. Think elegant, but comfortable. You don’t want to feel like you're trying too hard, but you don't want to look like you just rolled out of bed either. A few seriously nice dresses, a good suit (for the gents), some killer shoes (that you can actually *walk* in… cobblestone streets are a thing), and… and this is crucial: A really, REALLY good book. Because sometimes you’ll just want to hide in your ridiculously luxurious room and forget the world. (And maybe a tiny, travel-sized bottle of your favorite wine. Just saying.) And for the love of all that is holy, pack something for a minor wardrobe malfunction (e.g.. a lost button) and a small stain kit. You will thank me.
5. Is this place pretentious? Will I feel out of place?
Okay, let's be honest. A little. The hotel itself isn't *intentionally* pretentious, but the atmosphere… it attracts a certain… crowd. Expect to see people who clearly *think* they're important. Do *not* let it intimidate you! Honestly, I walked into the bar one evening a bit disheveled, wearing jeans and a t-shirt (after a *long* day of sightseeing), and I felt like *they* were making a statement by staring. The key is to be yourself, and to be confident. And if anyone gives you the stink eye, just smile sweetly and order another glass of champagne. Who cares what they think? You are paying to be here, enjoy it!
6. Can I bring my… *ahem*… *pet*?
Check the website, but honestly, probably not. Or if they do allow dogs, they are the *teacup* variety, and most likely, wearing a tiny tiara. I honestly don't know. But it's probably not a good idea.
7. Is it worth the money? (Because, let's face it, it's expensive.)
Alright, the big question. Is it worth it? Honestly? It depends. If you're looking for a budget getaway, absolutely *not*. If you're looking for a once-in-a-lifetime experience? Maybe. It’s a splurge, a serious splurge. But… there were moments, those moments of pure, unadulterated bliss, when I thought: "Yeah. I’d do this again." The feeling of pure indulgence, the incredible food, the stunning surroundings… it’s something. You'll have to decide if the experience is worth the price tag to you. I’m still debating it. But yes, probably. Just start saving now.
